Road Rage

It’s the little things that used to set me off, but not anymore.

Take, for example, the guy that cut me off in traffic this morning.

I was just going about my way, using the appropriate turn signals and all that, when this 18-year-old punk decided to cut me off just as I was about to make a turn. I slammed on the brakes and saw that he winked at me as he passed.

If this happened 6 months ago, I would have probably rolled down my window to shout obscenities at him. I would then proceed to fume over it all morning.

But no. I have been working on my anger management issues lately. My therapist always tells me that I should calm down and shift my mind to other things.

So I leaned back, took a deep breath, and counted to ten.

One. His plate had the number 1 on it. ROADK1NG, it said.

Two. He had two piercings on both his ears.

Three. This happened at Highway 3-A.

Four. I tapped the steering wheel four times before stepping on the gas pedal.

Five. I kept a five-car distance between the two of us.

Six. I counted six streets before I saw him smoking a cigarette beside his car.

Seven. It took him seven seconds to react before I rammed my car into his.

Eight. He swore eight times as I grabbed him by his pierced ears.

Nine. I punched him nine times before he stopped screaming.

Ten. It took ten minutes for the fire to die down after burning his corpse.

Ahh, that feels so much better.

It’s the little things that used to set me off, but not anymore.

–
Image source: deviantart.com/silentdistractions/art/TRaffic-48023798
First written August 5, 2017.
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